Thursday, November 1, 2018

HOW TO AVOID DESTROYING YOUR PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP



A friend recently shared with me the torment her daughter and family have been going through over the past year, and some awful memories came rushing back. Memories of a childhood where overweight was a curse met with bullying and ridicule, even by the people who claimed to love you. In those years and in our country, Jamaica, depression wasn’t (believed to be) a real thing. The feelings of self- loathing you developed because everyone else treated you like a pariah were simply you being a spoiled baby.

Much of that is still the same in any ethnic or social group. As a result, parents are often blamed for not recognizing the signs of a troubled childhood. But many parents see the issues up close and personally, and dismiss them as kids being kids. It is not from a lack of love, but a lack of understanding, especially if you’ve never been the victim of psychological assault yourself.

For the child who suffers, the dismissiveness of the parent may hurt more than whatever stress they’re enduring from their peers.
Parents seem to have a habit of blaming their children for being children. Rarely do they acknowledge that they too, as parents, make mistakes and aren’t perfect. They too have been careless and suffered preventable loss or injury, not because they are bad people, but simply because they are human. Probably wanting to live a perfect life vicariously through their children, they judge their kids much more harshly than they do themselves. It’s a troubling dynamic.

For my friend, her child’s reaction to bullying and personal insecurity ran the gamut from self-cutting, to an attempted suicide. In my own family I recently learned that one of my sisters went through a long period of depression because of our parent’s reaction to a robbery she survived. Our parent blamed her for being where she wasn’t supposed to be, instead of rallying to give her emotional support through this near-death experience.

Over ten years later, the damage from that reaction is still being undone. But I’m happy to confirm that my sister is a beautiful young woman with an amazing life ahead of her. With therapy and time, hopefully my friend’s daughter will also grow into a greater purpose. She’s planning on writing a book about her experiences so that parents don’t miss the warning signs before it’s too late to help their relationships with their own children, or even save their kids’ lives.

I don’t have any children of my own, but having been a troubled child and seeing lots of the parent-child dynamic from the outside, I have one piece of advice to parents. Find a way to teach your child that actions can have consequences they won’t be happy with, without making them feel like they deserve the bad things that happen if they make a wrong decision. Blaming your child for their own suffering will only make them feel crappy, and if you’re a good parent, possibly make you feel worse.

Calibe Thompson is a video media producer, speaker and author. Learn more about her services at http://www.islandsyndicate.com and share your thoughts on these and other opinion pieces on Facebook @calibethompson.

Monday, October 1, 2018

The love track



When it finally happens, how do you know for sure that the timing is right? Take your time. Don’t make assumptions. The first person you must have that feeling for is you. If you can’t love yourself then how can you love someone else? When someone tells you about themselves, believe it. Hopefully, these will be some of them:

1. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

2. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

3. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

5. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ... “

6. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... “

7. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

8. When did you last cry in front of another person or by yourself?

9. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

Visit:  www.JamaicanDiaspora.com

Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Leadership Survival




What will you do to make yourself unique? How will your product or service stand out?  The business world can be a nasty place, if you are not prepared. Here are some effective tools to become an effective leader.

1.       Never outshine the chief. People above you should never feel intimated because if they do, plan on being targeted. Position yourself to make your superiors appear brilliant and you will receive favors from them in many ways.

2.       Never put too much trust in associates. Be wary of your surroundings. Human nature is just that, regardless of your relationship with that person. Envy is always lurking around the corner, which will result in tyranny.

3.       Disguise your aims. Don’t tell everything because if you do, your competitors will create a defense. Keep them guessing on what are you really doing. False trails are always the best because by the time they figure it out, you are ahead to the game.

4.       Continually say less than necessary. No one likes a busy body. The more you say, the less you appear to be intriguing. You may be repeating something but do it in a way as if it is an original.

5.       Reputation is everything. The good books in Proverbs speaks of a good name is better than fine jewelry. Status alone can be the trump card to win or intimate your opponent; therefore, one slip will make you vulnerable and susceptible to attack.

6.       Encourage consideration at all cost. Why be ordinary? No one cares for followers or the perception of average. Stand out and be conspicuous. We are all selfish and people want to know what is in it for them. The way you attract, will answer that very question.

7.       Develop others to do the work but always take the credit. When you use insight and the groundwork of others, you save time and energy. The goal will be achieved with minimum input of your time, while you get the credit.

8.       Create the narrative so that others come to you. Forcing people to do things against their will is momentary success. You will have to continue harsh power for control. However, if people do things of their own free will, a better and longer production mode is in place. Make people feel they have control or power.

9.       Earn respect through your actions, never through argument. Ever hear the term, less is more? Demonstrate not illuminate. This is the ultimate power. Brute force will only conjure up ill will, which means you are leading.

1.   Septicity: avoid the unfortunate and luckless. Where does negativity take you? Nowhere! Don’t allow someone else’s misery to take you down. Yes, you should help others for it is the humane thing to do but not at the expense of your economic or political interest.

Thursday, August 2, 2018

Keys to your greatness




You are unique, so no one before or after you will have your capabilities. What are you doing to leverage your skills and talents? Why will your products or service will be chosen? How do you ensure this? Follow these recommendations:
1.                   Know how to manage your media. Are your media platforms making you money? How much time are you spending watching TV, You Tube and Facebook? Use these tools; don’t let these tools use you. Set a time limit and cut them off.
2.                   Know what is next. What you do today, will impact you tomorrow. Just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
3.                   Know your purpose. Define you. Don’t go along to get along. Relish in your uniqueness. Be the orange on the gray canvas.
4.                   Know how to become an open minded listener. You can hear something but are you listening? The only way the entrepreneur can tap a niche, to provide a product or service is to listen to the customer’s needs.
5.                   Know how to be persistent. Don’t let anyone tell you what you can’t do. Keep going and remember: When someone tells you it can’t be done, it’s more a reflection of their limitation not yours. Figure out a way to break through.

Monday, July 2, 2018

Crowdfunding



 Are you an aspiring entrepreneur? Do you need some seed money but your friend and families are not in a financial position to help you. Crowd funding can be an option for you. So, what is crowd funding? It is a way of asking people to support your vision. At the end of the day, you just might need some extra coins. I am not endorsing any one particular site, but here are some places on the web:
·         www.Appbacker.com
·         www.Crowdfunding.com
·         www.Gofundme.com
·         www.Indiegogo.com
·         www.Invested.in
·         www.Investedin.com
·         www.Kickstarter.com
·         www.Moola-hoop.com
www.Rockethub.com

Monday, June 4, 2018

Jamaica Science Technology Engineering & Mathematics (STEM) contributing to reducing Global warming.



The involvement of young people globally in the understanding and addressing of climate change is fundamental to future success in the reduction of global warming. It is universally acknowledged that a reduction of climate change will result when young people take an interest in their environment.  As the Jamaica STEM UK contact I will collaborate with Institutions in Jamaica and Institutions in the United Kingdom (UK) to promote the importance of embedding STEM subjects in the Jamaican education system. The Jamaica government working is already working in partnership with the European Union and the United Nations Environment Programme in a project aiming to reduce the risks caused by natural hazards and to increase the resilience of vulnerable areas in Jamaica due to climate change predictions, we will see rapid changes in rainfall distribution and rising sea level which are growing concerns for the people and the Jamaican government.

Demonstration and experimentation in school STEM workshops will build the confidence and offer more understanding of the need to use environmentally friendly generation of energy and to reduce the use of fossil fuels without too much disruption to local communities in the fourteen parishes of Jamaica. I have already spoken to Three Higher Education Institutions in the UK with the objective to a partnership with a well established Higher Education Institution in Jamaica on STEM initial Teacher training courses. In my present role, I am promoting collaboration with STEM institutions in the UK and Jamaica to promote joint Research ventures into understanding the importance of STEM subjects into our Universities initial Teacher training and STEM workshops in STEM High School academies.

In Jamaica like the UK we are very serious about tackling global warming leading to climate changes which will have devastating effect on our wild life and indeed agriculture, “I am calling to Jamaican Diaspora members and friends of Jamaica involved in STEM in the UK to email on douglasmorganuk@yahoo.co.uk. The STEM initiative can eventually link young people to apprenticeships schemes to ‘earn as you learn’
Thanking you in anticipation.

Douglas Morgan Med FHEA
Jamaica STEM, UK contact

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

7 steps to Jamwood Creation





Why isn’t the Jamaican film industry organized? We have the talent, great location and ingenuity. Jamaicans are on every continent, so take the skills you have acquired at your new residence and let’s become a force to create an empire of our own. What can we do to be organized?

1.    Have Jamaican producers and directors coalesce to the vision.
2.    Hire Jamaican actors that act outside of the stereotypical roles.
3.    Employ the best Jamaican authors and screenplay writers.
4.    Create Jamaican awards and award show to stimulate pride and creativity.
5.    Create and control film distribution mediums.
6.    Construct movie theatre and chains and hire Jamaican architects and engineers.
7.    Design a percentage of the ticket sales revenue to help HBCUs and Universities in Jamaica.